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@eviedoesla braid Queen šŸ‘øšŸ¾
the face x the personality on set. 🤣 

one thing about me ima pull the essence out of you šŸ˜‚ fun times always with @eviedoesla & @lookingforlids I will always have funnnn widit bby.
Her vibe Like a Dilla beat šŸ”Š
photo @j.milhouse 
hair: @_prettyyellow_
every-time I come home I’m reminded how influential black hair has been to my work. 

I believe national hairstylist day just past and this post is kinda late but whatever lol it’s relevant  regardless. Being from the hair capital literal
experiment: calm meets chaos
very saturn in Pisces energy 🪐 

currently browsing through work, archiving and there’s always a shot no one  got a chance to view.
perfection.
✨ life as a galaxy

ā€œTo be whole,

I had to let myself be splitā€

what a paradox?

The Paradox of Being Seen

June 09, 2025

Paradox Log 01

Why My Inner World Became My Most Important Work - 

We often chase visibility — in our art, our work, our lives — but the deepest kind of recognition begins in the quiet return to self. This is the story of how coming home, again and again, reshaped not only how I create, but why.

If you’ve known my online presence for a while, you know I’ve lived many lives across cities. From Detroit to Chicago to Los Angeles, with soul-shaping travels in between, I’ve constantly sought to evolve. But one thing all that movement has taught me is this: home isn’t just a place. It’s not the skyline, the zip code, or the people you return to. Home is the internal ground you build. The stillness you cultivate within. And coming home to yourself isn’t a one-time event  It’s a lifelong devotion. This Mother’s Day, I went home for the first time since my grandmother’s funeral. There was grief, yes, but also a deep settling. A quiet knowing. I realized that the idea of ā€œhomeā€  of stability, safety, and soul  is something we return to over and over. Sometimes through a physical visit. Sometimes through an inward collapse and reawakening. It felt familiar, like returning to the why behind my art. The truth behind the lens.

For over 15 years, I’ve been creating visuals that make people feel seen. But behind the beauty and clarity of my imagery, there’s always been a tension light and shadow, joy and grief, direction and surrender. What I’ve come to understand is that art doesn’t just emerge from aesthetics or strategy. It emerges from presence. From choosing to root yourself in who you are, even as the world tells you to perform something shinier, louder, more legible. In today’s world, it’s easy to get lost in wins, followers, press, and projections. Success becomes a performance. A role you’re cast in. But what happens when that version of success doesn’t feed your spirit? What happens when you achieve the thing, but feel no closer to yourself? That’s when I realized the equation I had to rewrite for myself: success does not always equal fulfillment.

On a recent flight, I was seated next to a man who stood up often during the ride, needing to stretch and move. I admit I was annoyed I had the aisle seat and had to keep getting up. But as we landed, he turned to me and said he was a monk and was getting up frequently to pray. He had noticed my tattoo — the symbol of the crown chakra on my hand. He asked if I believed in awakenings, and I told him I’ve had several. We talked briefly about death, the afterlife, and the process of letting go a bit intense for someone I just met yes, but that’s my life. Before we parted, he gifted me a book about self-realization.

It felt like the universe was speaking to me directly. That conversation reminded me of the difference between self-actualization and self-realization. For years, I’ve pursued self-actualization refining my craft, expanding my vision, building a name. It’s the process of becoming who you’re meant to be. It’s creative mastery, personal growth, and living with intention. I’ve dedicated my life to that. But self-realization is something deeper. It’s not about becoming more. It’s about remembering what you already are. It’s the quiet unraveling of illusion the idea that you have to earn your worth, prove your value, or chase your power. Self-realization is a spiritual homecoming. It’s not just knowing what you can do it’s recognizing that you are not separate from the source of your creation. That you are being itself. That’s where this new version of me is emerging. And it’s what Paradox Blog was born from — the intersection of the outer world and inner truth. The understanding that we can build, create, and show up fully in the world, while also tending to our roots, our rest, and our spiritual foundation. My work is no longer about proving it’s about remembering. Reclaiming. Realigning. Coming home isn’t always gentle. Sometimes it asks for a collapse. For discomfort. For surrender. But every time I listen to that nudge that quiet call to return I find myself again. Not the version I’ve curated for the world, but the version I’ve always been underneath it all.

Home, I’ve learned, isn’t a destination. It’s the ongoing practice of checking in, realigning, and choosing soul over surface. And when we return to that place, our art becomes more than image it becomes transmission and activation. So I ask you: What does home feel like to you? Are you building your life on solid ground or on what others expect of you? Have you made space to return? Because you don’t have to perform to be powerful. You don’t have to be perfect to be whole. You are allowed to soften, to listen, and still rise.

This is the paradox. And this is the path.

ā€œThe paradox is this: I disappear behind the camera

only to find myself.ā€






Tags: Self-realization Self-actualization Inner work Spiritual journey Creative process Emotional wellness Personal growth Conscious living Mindful creativity Holistic success, Artist journey, Photographer blog, Women creatives, Soul-led business, Black women in art (optional, if aligned), Liminal space, ntuitive creativity, Paradox living
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